So everything is going along just fine.
You’re taking care of the kids. You’re getting on with your to-do lists, both home and work.
It’s all good, you think, I can do this.
You’re feeling fired up by all you’re going to create and how wonderful it’s all going to be.
You complete another course, get another certificate, take on more responsibility at work. You’re on fire! Well done!
You say yes to a few things you wouldn’t normally. You work at stretching your comfort zone.
That’s a bit stressful actually but hey, it’s all good, you think, I can do this…everyone else seems to manage fine so I must be able to too.
…Although I do feel a bit tired, a little bit achy… and when is the last time I did yoga/went for a run?
No, never-mind! It’s the weekend soon, I can relax then.
Well, after I take the kids to football, ballet, fun dance… and of course after I do the shopping, catch up on the washing, clean the house, oh and don’t forget Sunday dinner!
You think – ‘Gosh, I don’t know why I’m feeling so tired lately?! and I just can’t get rid of this headache. I’ve had it for days’
Next weeks diary is looking a bit full, but hey I wanted this right? Can’t really complain.
So why do I feel so empty all the time…when did that happen?
…and my body is so sore…
You know what, I feel rotten actually.
I think I feel pretty rotten all the time.
Huh.
When did that happen…?
But hey, it’s all good. I can do this.
I have to do this. No one else will.
I said I could do this. I promised myself this is my year!
Yes I can do this!
Until you can’t.
Now I’m not saying building your career or business is bad.
I’m not saying being an ace Mum to your kids is bad.
I’m not saying doing things that stretch your comfort zone is bad.
All I’m saying is that we are human people, living human lives, in our human bodies with our human needs.
And sometimes we forget that.
Me too! I forget that too!
It took me months to admit I was pushing too hard and burning myself out.
Months!
…and I’m the ‘look after yourself’ gal!
So if it took me so long to get real with myself I wonder how long it takes other super on top of it women to recognise when they are asking too darn much of themselves?
Too long I’m guessing.
Often well past the point of no return.
So I’ve been looking at a few changes I can make to my life to get back in that yummy flow…
…where work is fun again,
and hanging with my family fills me up,
where I see more of my long neglected friends and…
I still get to feel like I’m moving forward towards the goals I set for myself this year.
Because they didn’t stop being important to me. I just wrapped my energy to tight around it all.
So I asked myself ‘What do I really want?’ and ‘What can I do now that will nourish me from deep within?’
Here are 4 of the my answers 🙂
One of the biggest solutions I’m trying for myself right now is saying ‘no’ to me!
To all the things I want to do or think I should be doing to build my business. I find when I can say ‘no’ first then I can find the yes within, if it’s there. Then the really important actions become clear to me.
Try it for yourself before you agree to do anything else for anyone else. See how the ‘no’ feels first. Allow yourself the thinking time to come back with a genuine yes or no.
Take small steps
Another super helpful action, and most of us know this by now, is really learning to take teensy tiny steps towards my desired outcomes.
Otherwise I break. Because every action I want to take in my business or life seems to involve about fifty billion more actions which could consume me, I’m having to learn to go really really slow. My friend Ashley Watson reminded me yesterday of the phrase ‘you’ve got to slow down to speed up’. Counter-intuitive, but true.
Racing towards an end goal and focusing only on that is pressure filled. I find that slowing down lifts the lid on that pressure and really helps clear the path ahead so you can see the steps with more clarity.
Slowing down also allows the space to re-evaluate and bring back in nourishing spiritual practices for the soul.
Support your Body, Nourish your Spirit
I found myself being called back to long walks, yoga, reading and meditating.
I’d been doing some but I’d managed to make it another thing I HAD to do rather than the thing I LOVE to do.
I feel so much better already just because I allow myself the time to do what fills me up.
Whatever your exercise or nourishing activity is, make it a priority. It always helps.
Clear the Blocks – Come out of Fight or Flight
And I do walk my talk so for the past few weeks I’ve been doing mountains of EFT tapping. Like a TON. So when I can’t work, I tap.
I tap on all the reasons I’m finding it hard. And it helps.
It may seem like nah! that’s a waste of time. How’s that going to help!?
Well it helps me in the moment to shift the heavy energy of being burnt-out and it helps further down the line when I’m ready to get back in the game to be fully in the game and do the things I was too afraid to do before.
Through the EFT Tapping I’ve changed my emotional response and my nervous system stress response to how I perceive the situation, in this instance just not feeling able or interested in my business.
Now I know that it’s OK to feel this way and to take the time I need, almost crave, to get me back to a good place. And then, as if by magic is feel like writing this blog 😉
The tapping I do now will also help me regain my energy and enthusiasm for the work I do love when I’m out of this heavy burn-out energy.
So I believe it is one of the key tools I have that keep me moving forward.
Here is some free tapping for you 🙂
That’s not all I’m doing of course. Outside support and connecting with people to help bring the joy back in is also very important. To journal is always a good idea when we feel stuck.
And of course calming and nourishing the nervous system in other ways like a massage or acupuncture or reiki etc.
Here is a great helpguide to managing burnout.
If you find yourself resonating with any of what I said here then do get on top of it now before it becomes a bigger, less manageable issue.
You may think you need to keep on keepin’ on but if you are already feeling a bit burnt-out then at some point your motivation will go and then you will have no choice but to down tools.
Take really good care of yourself now and it will pay dividends for you later.
My heart to your heart I truly hope my words reach you if you need them and help in some small way.
Helping Women Create Emotional & Financial Freedom